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Monday, September 12, 2011

Giuliana Rancic

Quit Whining! YOU have MONEY- do something with it besides whining. These are not unsolvable problems! DO SOMETHING with your life besides complain!

Being home from the wilds of the the Berkshires (and while nursing my elbow) I get to watch a lot of TV. (It's funny how quiet the country gets at night without the hum of the TV in the background.)

Somehow I found myself watching Giuliana & Bill. My wife FORCED me. She taped my eyeballs open and FORCED ME!  It is the most boring " show" I have ever seen. I watched a chunk of Andy Warhol's Empire in college. For those unfamiliar, it is a 24 hour single shot of the Empire State Building. This is more interesting and shows more personality than the nattering of Giuliana and Bill.

To the blissfuly unaware : Giuliana Rancic is an ubiquitous E! channel personality. She is an E! news anchor. In practice, this means her job requires her to be stick thin like a coathanger and look like a cross between a pretty frog and an afghan hound and read teleprompter copy in a pleasant voice.
She wears silly outfits and complains a lot on her show. She pops up on other E! shows and collects a fat paycheck for being her oddly thin and frog/hound self.

Somehow that equates to giving her and her annoying husband who can't stop travelling or constructing things a reality TV show. We are sometimes actually watching paint dry on the show. Sometimes his extreme homemakeover tribute shows are so boring , even the other people working on the house can't wait for them to finish and they are getting paid for it.

See, Giuliana's really busy! She's trying to keep her career going by being on 12 TV shows! And her husband doesn't always understand! And they're trying to have a baby! But they can't stay in the same city at the same time . Andzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz......

I'm working on my anger. But damn! I have never seen anyone complain more about less. An actual episode was all about her and her husband bickering about his 40th birthday party. ("I don't want one!" "I'm going to throw you one!") Then they had a marriage crippling fight about whether they should open their new restaurant in Chicago (husband's choice after he just decided he wanted to move to LA and then changed his mind after he sold their house out from under then during their YEAR OF FUN- whatever the hell that is) or LA (Where they live).

When people talk about "White People Problems," this is what they mean.
These people are too rich to be this boring. Entitled people who are worried about trivial things that have easy solutions. You work too much? Do one less TV show!  You don't like living in LA, stay in Fucking Chicago!
You want a baby? Go adopt one! You have money! Just stop @^#*()&# whining!

I know there are hundreds of channels to fill with programming.
Why give these people or the Kardashians any more money. They aren't going to do anything worthwhile with it except annoy us some more! Can't we just put another Law & Order on in their place?

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